The Conversation Women in Automotive Need to Hear | Maryann Croce , Melissa Birdie Patterson and Tiffany Scherado-Birou - Ep 26

0:00Our members are just so fantastic, right, about propping each other up and supporting each other. You mentioned the bracelet earlier that, you know, Birdie picked out for us that says, she belongs here. She belongs here. Whoever she is, wherever she is, at whatever point of her path into the industry that she's at, it's for them. Welcome to Downshift with Tanika Haynes, the Automotive Auntie.

0:24The thing about Tanika She gets to know you. She'll laugh and cut up with you, but then she'll hit you with some knowledge that you may not want, but that you need. Let's downshift. So amazing women in automotive—we're going to talk about that. But it's so much more than a group meeting once a week, or what is that? Is it once a week?

0:49Yeah, once a week. That's a fun little meeting. Yeah. Now we get to go in there and say. You know what happened this week? But more than that, it's more than that. And I want you— who's the best explaining how you guys came up with this and what your real goals are? Well, I'll let Birdie start and then I'll hop in because she was there from the onset, even before I took over.

1:15So, yeah, Malin Newton had this idea. He encountered at different trainings women their voice being shut down. And with that, he ended up partnering with Dori Epstein. I'm not sure you're familiar with her. Yes, with the curly, amazing hair. I love her. Yeah. She had this idea. And in Bellingham, which was the town that I worked in, in the collision shop, she and I got to know each other.

1:42However, she had— there was an Amazing Women in Bellingham group. And she took that concept, got permission, and said, I think we need Amazing Women in Automotive. Okay. And so Malin said, you build it, we'll make it happen. I'll fund it, let's support it. And so she came up with this concept and it had the roundtable with the idea of doing a women's retreat and the goals of recruit, retain, and engage women, trying to keep us and get more women into this industry.

2:11It's very important. And right now, before we lose— people lose interest, because, you know, You know, we're heavily dominated with men, and the men are looking like, what they gonna talk about today? We're gonna talk about how you need to bring more women into your business, whether it's the front or the back, how to get the wives involved maybe, because you and your husband, like I've heard wives say, I don't know what to do.

2:37Even if they're not working in the shop, how can we help our husbands and support our husbands? How to allow your daughter to also come into the industry. My dad didn't try to force me out, but there's plenty of times he said, you sure you want to do this? You sure you want to do this? And then, uh, yesterday, um, Keith Perkins, his daughter, who is a firecracker, she is ready to teach, she's ready to run the shop.

3:01And I believe she's 15. I think she's just 15. So do not tune out, fellas, because this is important to you as well. And if I heard that you turned out on this podcast, you just turned it off, I'll find you and I'll rip your ear off. So, listen up. All right, ladies, let's do it. So, one thing I do wanna say, I am a bossy Capricorn, firm-headed.

3:23You can't tell me nothing. You can't— I am not a timid little girl. That's not a bad thing to be. I'm not trying to be derogatory. So, I am so glad that you have this space. But one thing I want to put out there is, This space is not us in there talking about kumbaya, and we're not allowing each other to cry about everything.

3:47We're in this space and we're coming— we're sharing problems, sharing solutions, and sharing ideas. So we're not in there burning broth, okay? No man-shaming. No man-shaming. We don't even talk about men. We ain't got time to talk about that. But what this space is, is for the young lady that is coming to the industry that has not found her tribe. And this walking into a conference, and I said it before, walking into ASTA, it can be intimidating to a strong Black woman like me because there are a bunch of old white men.

4:23And whether you're Black, white, Asian, Hispanic, that can be intimidating to walk in and nobody looks like you. Nobody has any boobies. Well, they have 'em, but they're not supposed to have 'em. So, when we have— fellowship as a woman via a Zoom call. It is refreshing. And I think this space is important because we can get all our nieces in there that are uncomfortable, and then we can help them.

4:51Hey, you know you have to come out of this space. You know you have to go to more networking events. Like, you can't just stay there, right? So, but this is— this is kindergarten, it's Head Start, it's a safe space. That's right. Am I taking that right? Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. Okay, so, that's what this group, to me, feels like. And sometimes, it's really hard to get that timid, shy personality in there, right?

5:12They're nervous. They don't know what they're gonna say. And so, it's our job to call on them a little bit, not too aggressively, but, you know, get 'em to introduce themselves, get them to warm up. I feel like we're pretty good about that. I— our members are just so fantastic about propping each other up and supporting each other. Supporting each other and saying positive things.

5:34And you mentioned the bracelet earlier that, you know, Birdie picked out for us that says, she belongs here. She belongs here. Whoever she is, wherever she is, at whatever point of her path into the industry that she's at, it's for them. Running a great auto repair shop isn't about working harder. It's about being intentional with your time, team, and how your business runs.

5:58That's where TechMetric comes in. Shop management, payments, and marketing all in one platform. Your team works from the same information. Your customers get a better experience. And at the end of the day, you actually know where your business stands. Less noise, more clarity, more control. If you're building something worth being proud of, the right platform matters. Learn more at techmetric.com or use the link in the show notes.

6:27We already know what to do. We've been to the trainings, paid for the coaching, learned the right way to inspect cars, build estimates, and talk to our customers. That's not the problem. The problem is consistency, because some days it only works when the right person is working, and when they're not, it's a whole different shop. So now you're stuck in that cycle.

6:45You need a strong team to run a great shop, but you need a great shop to attract a strong team. Make it make sense. That's why I rock with Detect Auto. Detect Auto streamlines your service processes with automations that save time, increase maintenance sales, and improve productivity without changing your whole system. It plugs in, guides your team through inspections, recommendations, and even customer communication.

7:11Now that's not just based on memory or mood. That's how a shop runs. And let me tell you, I've been using it for over a year now. My ARO is up 63%. That's not new knowledge, that's just consistency. If you're tired of your shop depending on who showed up today, go check out Detect Auto, book a demo. Yeah, and some of the younger women don't feel that they have anything to offer.

7:37Well, I can't teach anybody anything yet. You would be amazed at how much they teach us because we've been in the industry so long, sometimes we get— exactly, blinders. Yeah, they're fresh eyes. Right, we get fresh eyes. We get another generation's take on things. There's so much to offer. One of the things we're really pushing right now, I don't even know if you knew too much about it yet.

8:02So, we've always had a mentor-mentee program. We've got several that just recently signed up. And so, I'm reaching out and I'm like, hey, I've got somebody in your area. What do you think about— this young lady. Let's go for lunch, boo-boo. Yeah. And their first response is, I've never done that before. Am I responsible enough to be a good influence? Right. Are you sure about that?

8:26And I'm just like, give it a try. Just give it a try. If I see it in you, it's there. And sometimes, we just need somebody to tell 'em— tell us that. Yeah, we do need somebody to tell us that because I know that now, I can say it that, Why are you doing this, Tanika? What are you doing? I don't know what I'm doing, but I do know that I wish I had a me 30 years ago.

8:48Yes, exactly. So, when I was at, um, a conference in Houston for Collision, it was all women, and— but I was— there was nobody in my age group. Yeah, you know, I think I was 23 when I won that ICAR Award. It was fun, but everybody was more mature, and I really didn't fit in, and there was no village, and maybe just because they didn't know how to do it.

9:09And sometimes, I was like, I still don't know what I'm doing, but I will be your automotive auntie, and I will take that badge, and I'll run with it. And there's no blueprint. But I know that the connections that I have made made me so warm and fuzzy for a young lady to call me with her wins, her losses, her questions, or joke.

9:28Yeah. So, I— because sometimes, they just need an ear and a heart. Exactly. Exactly. That's what they need from you. I love it. I started at the age of 18, and I was in my 30s, mid-30s, before I found out about training events. I had started doing online ICAR certifications, but I didn't know that there was this community out there. Right. And it took me half of my journey to discover it.

9:52So, I want— that's my goal, is to help people know that there is a community out here, that there is training, there is support, and there are events out here. And I think women, and I see it in this group, need to be reminded. It's all of us that we're capable of so much more than we realize. Oh, yeah. We're really good at it.

10:09We need to hear that more because people will come in, as you were saying, they're newer to the group, they're not sure, and they don't realize that. They— but other people will see it in them. I also think that a lot of women may not even be considering the automotive industry, but what they have to realize is whatever area they're in or industry they're in, they come into the automotive industry, there's a lot of skills that they have that are transferable.

10:38Marketing, accounting, everything is needed. Yes, and they don't realize that they do have things to offer, even if they're new to the industry. Sometimes it's really good to have that outside perspective. Absolutely. It's just so valuable. Because you don't have to be dirty. I wonder if girls, young ladies think, Oh, if I go in the shop, I'll be dirty. You, you're not.

10:57I get my nails done and my hair sometimes is done. But no, you— I mean, there's nothing wrong with not having hair and nails or whatever, but it's not going to turn you into a man. No. If you love cars or you just love processes, or if it's the family business and you're not sure where you fit in and you're a Facebook, Instagram, TikTok marketing guru, you can go in Dad's shop and say, Dad, Like Callie Grace.

11:20Oh my gosh, she's amazing. Oh my goodness. What she has done. That girl don't know a car, a Toyota from a Tesla. But a marketing heart, she has it. And so there's so many— Their Facebook page is so fun. Their Facebook page is so fun. So fun. Oh, it makes me so happy. I need my car to break down just so I can go over there and meet these people.

11:35That's what you're thinking when you look at that. And I'll tell them, bitch, you don't know nothing about no marketing. So you have, there's more than just a service advisor or a tech. There's other— like, you came out of banking, right? And so with bank and managing, so with that came processes and procedures. And you do a great job of telling people, get out of your shop, go sit down somewhere.

11:57You're good at coaching that. So yeah, so that is what Amazing Women in Automotive is about, just opening the doors and then opening the doors to the lobby, then open the doors to the training, and open the doors to your own shop. That's right. Yeah, that's right. So how do we, um, How do you get the word out? I know we have the women's dinner.

12:19That is always fun. Yep. And we do the stuff with the schools. So, I'm partnering with a number of— there are some colleges out there that have small female student groups or automotive student groups. There's a young lady I just recently visited with named Karen that has a group called WATT, Women in Automotive Technology. I can't remember what the other one stands for.

12:43But we're partnering with them so that they make that transition out of that student group from the technology center straight into ours. So, there's never any gap. They're fully supported through their education and then for their entrance. But this year, one of the really fun things that we're doing is our second retreat. We did the retreat last year in Utah. This year, we're going to Gatlinburg.

13:05That is a fantastic way to teach us to focus on ourselves, and that it's okay, and there's no guilt for it. We are— we spend most of our lives taking care of everybody else, constantly pouring into other people. And we take very little time to fill ourselves back up. So, we run around half empty, you know, if that. If that. Running on fumes.

13:32Right, especially if we have kids, or, you know, they have the sandwich group. They're taking care of kids. They're taking care of their parents. You know, there's just a lot that we balance as women. And this gives them a few days to try to let it all go and refill their cup. And connect with women that we can identify with. Right. Been there, done that.

13:54I remember, I don't know how long ago, it was a while ago, but there was a young lady in one of the meetings and her kids were just running around. And it's like, honey, that's fine. They're going to grow up. Like, how do I have these kids and run the shop at the same time? It's okay. Actually, use them as marketing. Make them promote.

14:14Get them promoted. Like, don't— motherhood is not an excuse, but motherhood is not going to hinder you in the shop. It's actually only going to make you stronger. That's right. So, but having a mom that you can talk to about, what do I do with these kids when they get out of school? And for me, it was— it's like someone had to give me permission to do certain things when the kids were much younger, you know, 10 years old.

14:36Years ago, I would bring them in with me all the time, and it was kind of like torture to them. Um, I thought, you know, oh, you just— family business, you need to be here. Someone gave me permission to hire a nanny. I know it sounds really stuck up, but it's not. I just had a kid that was in the local college.

14:50She'd pick them up from school, get them to practice, and by the time I got off of work, I couldn't get to practice. I was helping her. Yeah. And then I had— my kids could go to practice and not have to go to the shop, and I didn't feel guilty that they couldn't go to football practice. And I really didn't miss anything except for like 30 minutes.

15:04But that 30 minutes that she bought me was worth so much more. So, in these groups, we can have these conversations saying, how do you give yourself permission to be super mom and super boss lady? It's possible. You can't do it all, but yeah. I love what you said about giving yourself permission because when you are in a situation like that and you're making a decision, I know that a lot of moms, a lot of women will— I coined it mother guilt.

15:36You feel guilty no matter what you do. It's just, I call it mother guilt, mom guilt. But the thing is, is we have to be able to give ourselves permission to accept that help. Accept help. We need to do that. It's okay. It has to be guilt-free. And what you were talking about with the kids being in the shop and everything, think about the strength.

15:55Think about how you're influencing your children. That you can manage to do it. You find ways. You hand off things to them. You hand off things to other people. But you're still getting it done. You're navigating through those challenges. And it's leadership, the same way you lead your kids. Exactly. Exactly the same. It's the same way you lead your kids. And they can see it.

16:17They can see it. So, Jordan is 20. And he called me a couple of weeks ago. So, it is now— what is it, May? So, it was May. So, Jordan called me back in April. And he's in school. Tech school, and he said, Ma, I just wanna let you know that you're a really good boss and a really good leader. And I'm like, wow, goosebumps, thank you.

16:35He's like, Ma, I watch people and I watch other kids and how you taught us and things like that. And I'm just like, I thought I just ruined your whole little life because I had you here, there, and everywhere and whatever. But he's— but they're seeing you take on that role of super mom, whether you think you're doing it right or not.

16:52They don't have anything to compare it to, right? So we have to remind each other, and we do that in the Amazing Women in Automotive group, that you're doing so much better than you think. That's right. And with all of that stuff, that is part of leadership, and you can take that into a business. Like, once you figure out how to— your morning routine with your kids, and once you get that down pat, morning routine at the shop, you can put one in place as well.

17:15So yeah, I think we don't give each other— we don't give ourselves enough credit for all that we do. And that is really a superpower. And that can translate into an amazing opportunity at the shop. Absolutely. We're really good as women at pointing out our faults or what we can't do, but we're not so quick to give ourselves a pat on the back.

17:39Yeah. Yesterday, a girlfriend put on Facebook and she said, write 3 things that you love. And it was just a question, no picture or anything. And I was like, chicken wings, Pocketbooks, and I don't know what I put. And I was trying to be funny, but that's stuff I love. And today, this morning, I woke up, she made another text— Facebook post.

17:59And she said, of all the answers I got yesterday, nobody said themselves. Oh, yeah. Eye-opening, huh? Eye-opening. So, yeah, we don't give ourselves permission to be tired. We don't give ourselves permission to take credit for things that we do. I had to learn— I'm learning that when someone walks up to me and say, hey, Miss Tanika, I enjoy your podcast, I cannot say thank you yet.

18:29I can say, oh, it's nothing. I still do that to myself. It's not nothing. Yeah, well, thank you. But I have to learn. But a lot of women, like, you know, if I say, Brittany, your glasses are amazing, some people will say, oh, these cheap old things, instead of just taking that. Yeah. So, we gotta do better, women. Own that. I'm working on me too.

18:48But these are the conversations that we're having in the book, right? And that's a good thing to give yourself permission to do, right? Permission to do, right? Say thank you. So, we've all been in the industry and doing this for how long? A very long time. We're in our 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, and we still catch ourselves doing it, right? Absolutely. It's difficult not to fall back on those old habits.

19:09So, like you said, having a tribe, you know, having a girl gang, Okay, that can say, Tanika, stop talking like that, right? You know better. You know better than that. Just quit it. Call me. That's what I love about untying them, because when you call me like, uh-uh, like one of my sweethearts, and I'm not gonna say her name, but she called me.

19:27She had, um, not been at the shop because she couldn't, and she was having a hard time. She was like, the numbers is— this is going bad and this is going bad. I believe it was a Thursday, and she said, this is wrong and this is wrong and this is wrong and this is wrong, and Just 3 young girls. And I said, you want auntie advice?

19:44She's like, yes. I said, screw it. Now, I didn't say screw. I said, screw it. Deal with it Monday and go get your girls and have a dance party. That's what we're gonna do. We're gonna— okay, you finished crying? Okay, we're not crying no more 'cause there's nothing you can do about the past. But we're gonna go have a dance party with those girls this weekend, and you better send me some footage, and we'll deal with it Monday.

20:05Monday morning, we'll buckle down and deal with it. Send me the footage. Send me some footage, and we'll deal with it Monday. And she sent me the footage. At a dance party. And that's all the advice I could give her at that point. But then later, I said, well, with the credit card, let's go ahead and just call the company and say, hey, can you reduce this credit card rate?

20:21She said, I never heard of that. Exactly. Somebody told me, now I'm telling you. So, that's just part of the mentorship. And it's not a big thing. You don't have to be all knowledgeable. It's just like something that you're not thinking about. Sometimes, it's just those little changes. Just a little change. Well, and like you were talking about, I went ahead and hired a nanny.

20:38That wasn't— massive, but it made a massive impact on you. Yeah, but I had mom guilt because I was like, I can't take care of my own kids. I can. This is the way I'm doing it right now. But Mary Ann's mentioned, you know, I hired somebody to fold the laundry and do the laundry at my house. It wasn't a big thing, but it was something that gave her a lot.

20:57We've talked about using AI in our personal lives to create the grocery list and create the menu and just take a little bit off of our plate. Yes, my AI, his name is Franklin. He does a great job. Ruby. I have Ruby. It's like, Frank, okay, and I'm just talking to it. And we talked about you can do that in the business for your SOPs.

21:17Oh, yes. Do the same thing to be a leader in your shop. Be a leader in your shop. Just, okay, how do I get my SOPs out of my head onto paper? Tell Frank, Frank, I'm writing SOPs for the shop. I'm just going to talk to you for a long time and then we're going to coordinate this a little bit later. Do not answer me until I tell you.

21:38Oh, yeah, you have to speak fast. You about to be able to keep talking. It's like, no, let me get it all out, Frank. We're doing SOPs right now. Yep. And that's it. I mean, AI, it's not gonna— oh, talk about AI. AI is like a wonderful assistant and it's not coming from our— for our jobs. Nope, that's right. The bots are not coming to get us.

21:55It is not a Will Smith movie. And yeah, it's just help. It's not— it's garbage in, garbage out. Great stuff in, great stuff out. It's a computer. Yeah, yeah. You can't rely on it fully. It's not— no, it's not you, you know, but it gives you a great And it guides you to— like, once it gets to know your personality— Yeah, mine thinks I'm crazy.

22:15It guided us to some really great places this weekend. That's right. It did. Fabulous restaurant. It was amazing. It guided us to the John Legend concert this weekend. Oh, yeah. You did? Yeah, right here in Hershey. Hershey Theatre. That's crazy. So— Thank you, AI. Thank you, AI. Hey, Ruby. Shout out. So, okay, so, you got these girls in the group. We've got some women in there.

22:38Do you ever have a hard time getting them to come out of shells and get out of the group? Not out of the group, leaving the group, but to actually— In person? In person. I would have to say one of our biggest successes showed up, pulling, pulling. Yes. Every Wednesday. Every Wednesday. Yes. Yes. We— she finally showed up for the dinner. Michelle.

22:58And then stayed the whole weekend. She just left last night, took classes and everything. Yeah. She won our scholarship to Vision. Vision a couple years ago, 2 or 3 years ago. Yeah. She'd not been to training. Came to that training and now on her own came to this one, to Tools 2026. What does she work for? She owns her own transmission shop.

23:17Oh, with her brother. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Second generation. So, I wonder what keeps not even just women, but people from coming to training. Well, they think they can't leave the shop. Time away. Oh, they can't close it down. We have to work. We have to make money. Yeah. They're wearing so many hats. They're doing it all. And then, there's the families. There's so many reasons that you can't come.

23:38You have to prioritize it, and it's really hard to put it it at the top. Right. Yeah. And one of the things we've really struggled with, and I'd like to find a way, but having a technician, having more technician participation, 'cause they are in the shop during the day, so it's difficult for them to join us during our meeting. But we've tried a couple times to have an after-hours meeting.

24:02But they're tired by then. They're tired. They're at home bathing the kids, doing whatever. And so, I've had a bunch of them reach out, I want this, I want this, but then we go and do it. And that nobody shows up. Yeah, you know, that's a struggle in, um, Mexico and Latin America is they're very female technician forward. And so our group, our management group, right, is smaller, but the technician training is happening 2 to 3 days a week.

24:28AWEA Latina is happening and it's strong. Wow, very different, very different culture. The Latina, yeah, group versus our American group. Sponsor sponsor them. Yeah, yeah, that's amazing. I didn't mean to say amazing, that was funny. But yeah, just be at your box, get your earbuds on, and listen, because you really don't have to look at us unless you like to watch me make faces, because I make some faces.

24:53Um, but yeah, um, I can see that could be a problem. Yeah, I wonder if— yeah, the technicians are, they're wrenching and they can't log on. Do just that. I've seen some of them will pop in and they'll put in the chat, hey, I'm working, but I'm listening. And I'm like, okay. And then, I'll get messages and they'll say, you know, I really enjoyed today's lessons, or today's conversation, or whatever.

25:15I've learned a lot from it. So, even when we don't think that they're engaged, or that they're getting anything out of it, you'd be amazed. You'd be amazed about how you can just touch people by saying whatever's on your mind. Because if you need to hear it, somebody else does too. And sometimes, it's just being in a space with women that makes the difference.

25:33The energy. Yeah. There's been, as Tiffany was saying, there have been women that have been on the calls, and we encourage them to get on the call, even if they're at the front counter, or the phones are ringing, I'm going to silence my mic, or mute. And they're taking care of what they are. Maybe they were able to hear 20 minutes out of the hour call.

25:56But I've actually had women say to me, that 20 minutes, I needed to hear that this week. That really helped. So, the nice thing about it, it's very informal. So, even if you can't make the whole thing, but jump on when you can, you may get some good stuff that really helps, you know. And it's inclusive. And I would ask the women that are listening, and the men that are listening, even if you think you don't need this, what we're talking about, Get on anyway.

26:26That's what I've been doing. Like, I was like, I don't need anything. I don't have anything to complain about, whatever. Like, get on anyway so you can become a friendly face. And then, maybe, you can just be a soft face for the next person that's like, oh, I saw Tanika in there, so let me go back again. You know, not saying that I'm worth seeing in there, but you know what I mean?

26:47Like, and then, if I share— Oh, but you are. Thank you. Everybody said thank you. You said thank you. I did it. You have permission. Why are you so kind? Because it's a real thing. It's just the energy. It's the energy. And so, like, if I can come in there with my auntie energy and make you laugh. Or like, Christy Byrds is such an educator.

27:07If she has a drop of knowledge, I just wanna be hearing it. And if it's just like, a weekly encouragement, like, you know what? It ain't that bad. You don't necessarily have to have a situation going on to be in that room. We're just in there shooting it. Well, like you said, sometimes you just need that laugh. Because that's what— when you get off that call, now you got to go back and handle something, you know?

27:27So, that gives you a little bit of time. And like I said, it's not kumbaya, because there's been some times when someone had a situation and we looked at them like, I know you lying. Oh, I know. That's me. That's my personality. This technician is just like— and he still got a job? Like, come on, sis, let's do better. So, yeah, we're not in there being a bunch of whining ladies.

27:47It's not gonna happen. Not on my watch. I'm not sitting in there. But we have had some emotional tears. Yeah, we have had some. I got some. I probably didn't share them on camera, but it's like, yeah. Yeah, yeah. We've had some emotional tears where, you know, somebody newer to a shop or something of that nature has come on and you can feel what they're feeling because you were there.

28:08Been there, done that. Yes, you can feel the stress. You can feel the anxiety because they feel like their staff doesn't. Appreciate them. They're bending over backwards to give them the world. They're not taking paychecks 'cause they're trying to make them happy, and they're getting nothing out of it. And it's hard. Some of those— some of those are hard. And that is hard when like, your village, like that one person in the village is having a bad day and you take it personally.

28:36That means you're doing it right. That's right. That's right. If it bothers you here, I feel like that means you're doing it right. You're doing it from a good space. Right. The day you stop feeling it— The day you stop feeling it and you're just in there— Pass it on to somebody else. Yeah, exactly. 100%. So you— how much are you in the shop anymore?

28:57You got— Oh, I'm in the shop all the time. It's the grandbabies. Nope. Nope. Who had grandbabies in the background? Maryanne. You got the grandbabies in the background. I have the grandbabies. How much do you go into the shop now? Now, I'm in approximately 5 days a month. Oh. Like a week? You still work a month? Yeah, 5 days a month. And it depends.

29:19You know, if I'm traveling, it's less. But I feel so blessed to have the amazing team that I do. Once Tony and I started growing the business, we realized that— it was like one day we were talking about it. And I said, we have to do things differently. This has become bigger than we are. It's bigger than us. We started seeing it as something separate from us.

29:43And that was a good thing. But that was a hard shift to make. And really pouring into your team, and the team stepping up, giving them that opportunity, because it's so easy as an owner. I've been there. I know it. I still have to keep reminding myself of it. Letting go of things, you're allowing your team to feel those wins. You're empowering them.

30:07They wanna step up. They wanna do things. And I phrased it in my mind to myself that I am actually robbing them of that. That's true. If I don't do it, I'm robbing them of those wins. So, we saw it bigger than ourselves. And it was time to really develop people. I think I'm there now. Still feeling guilt for not being there and traveling so much with the podcast and doing other things like that.

30:35And I'm enjoying that whole journey, but then, I'm feeling like, the guilt of my absence. Like, oh man, I should be at work. I should be at work 4 days a week from 7:00 to 5:30, even at 7:00, 'cause I need them to see me working. Right? Right. So, they know I'm not just collecting a check and having a great time. Exactly.

30:55So, that is real, but I know that when I'm— in the shop, I'm in the way, right? I'm in the way at this point because I have been working on training my staff and allowing them to do their jobs without me micromanaging. And that is a hard thing. That is hard. It's a hard shift. It's a very hard— and to walk away from it, because we were talking about, um, someone else was like, that, that's my baby.

31:18Yeah. And that's— Marianne, I would argue that it isn't luck. You crafted this You designed it and created that freedom for yourselves and empowered your team. That is skill. That's skill. It's a developed skill. That was on purpose. Yeah. That was one of the things that I wanted to be able to do. And, you know, I challenge you too, because I felt the exact same way that you did.

31:42But I wanted to be available when I had those grandbabies to be able to have them one day a week. And That to me is like, I've earned that. Yeah. Right. And I don't feel guilty about that at all. I just have my day that I can spend with them and it's Mimi time with the grandkids and I absolutely love it. So my challenge to you is when you think about your role as the owner, what you've probably done is said, this is what worked so far.

32:11Now you have to change that role, change what you do, define it, and give yourself permission to do that. It's a hard shift. I had to make that shift. It's hard. It reminded myself what you and Tanika have done by empowering them while you are still there in the shop and giving them that independence. So when you are there, they're not relying on you.

32:32What I see happen so often is that all of a sudden they just take themselves out of the picture and they haven't empowered their staff. Right. And so now the morale just drops. My You know, my guiding star in the shop is just gone. And then, there's no leadership. Because now, they're like, well, I can't work in the shop, you know, because I'm supposed to be working on the shop.

32:56But— I think people do that too soon, also. Yes, yes, yes. 'Cause, you know, the coaching companies are saying, you should be working on your business, not in your business. And they're doing that in the first 18 months. It's like, if you don't take your goofy butt back to work, like, you have not earned any of that yet, love. Like, go to work.

33:11You need to do both, and you need to stay there 7, 8— Go home, eat, come back to work. It takes time to get there. And, um, but what I, I've been doing, I think I, I know I've been doing a good job at— you see how I rephrase that? I've been doing a good job of that because I've been checking in.

33:27What do you need from me? This is where you are. This is where we should be. Do you have all of your tools? What— being available. Hey, Miss Tamika, this is happening. Okay, my question to you now is, okay, what do you think you should do? Give me some— give me some ideas of how you think you should handle that. And, oh, I was thinking this, and I was thinking that.

33:47Well, this would work, but this is the consequence of that. And this would work, and this is the consequence of that. So, go ahead and let me— leadership. I've been talking about that a lot. Yeah, so, let me know which one you choose, and then, we'll learn from there. Encourage their own critical thinking. Exactly. And it's been really good. It was really good.

34:05Like, the leadership part is what I've really been talking about on the podcast. Because to me, I was just thought like, you just come to work, you do your job, we make some money, we go home because I said so. It was the leadership, right? Because this is the way, it's the leadership. And that's how my father was, which is fine, but it's so much more to it.

34:20And to see them get their own wins and be excited about beating a number from last month or last year— some owners think, and I have thought this as well, that if I show the numbers They're gonna think, I'm rolling in dough. Or if I show them the numbers, they're gonna steal from me. Or if I show them the numbers, they're gonna want more money.

34:41And that has not happened for me. They understand, and it gives them a goal. And then, they're just like— and they shoot the shot. You empowered them. We have empowered them. Ditto, yep. Yeah, so that is— and women are good leaders. And what you just described— And you can build a team of leaders, right? It doesn't matter if you're a lot porter, you can still be a leader.

35:00It doesn't matter. You can be the best lot porter in the whole flippin' world. Exactly. Exactly. Bring that energy. In your business was you built your team. And that's a stage of business. I call it build-up. And then, from there, now, your role is shifting. And now, you're in what I call leader-up. Now, you have to develop leaders and have them be able to make decisions.

35:24So, I feel like with Stuart, I'm trying to push leadership on him. And I'm getting— he was like, yeah, what would you do about that? Now, this is what I'm seeing. You see what I see? Like, he was having an emotional time with, you know, attack. And I was like, you're not looking at it right. You're looking at it as an employee.

35:39I want you to step back and look at the facts and look at this, and then you make a decision. And he was able to do that. He's like, I see what you're talking about. So I'll be feeling good as a leader, but he ain't proud. I ain't got nothing to do. Yeah, so it's— the hard part for me has been the fact that the boys don't need me anymore because I've raised those crumb snatchers.

36:04So they don't need me, they don't call me every day, and it's not, Mom, Mom, Mom. Because moms, we really think that, oh, I'll be glad when you get out my house. You're not. No. Oh, you're not. Because then you're like, well, what am I supposed to be doing now? So that's how I feel at the shop. So I'm there at the shop and they're handling everything.

36:19I don't know one car, not one RO. I don't know what's on the books. I don't know what's coming in. I don't know what's going out, which is a good feeling until you're like, what am I supposed to do now? You worked yourself out of a job. I've worked myself out of— I've let myself out of a job. You don't need me.

36:35You don't need me to order that. Like, you handle it without me. It's like your kid. Oh, you want them to take the training wheels off and, you know, ride the bicycle. But when it's happening, you don't need mommy to hold the back of the thing. No, I'm gone. And like, he's like, you don't need me to take you to practice. I've got a car, woman.

36:55Yeah. But see, now you're transitioning to sharing your knowledge. I'm sharing my knowledge and becoming an auntie. That's right. That's right. All your talent has given you value in another way. But that's where your why comes in, right? So that's not, we're not just talking about women right now. We're just talking about shop owners that need to transition. You know, you're leading and everything you've put into place has got it going on.

37:18What do you do with yourself now? So, that's a question that you have to ask early on. And I thank God that Braxton just kept, Miss Tonika, you should do this. Miss Tonika, you should do that. I'm just like, ugh. And I told Michael from the Institute, and I've said this before, we were at the leadership intensive, and he's like, well, what's your new why?

37:37And who are you? And blah, blah, blah. And he's like, I just want you to write it down. And I was like— and it all came a-flowin'. I wish I had it in front of me. I need to memorize it. But it says that you are a strong, courageous leader. And I was like, I ain't no leader. I don't wanna do that, you know.

37:54And I had been praying for, um, the Prayer of Jabez, which is, you know, um, dear God, increase my territory. Let me do no harm, you know. And I have said this before, and I'll tell you ladies, but I'm sitting there telling God for the last 10 years, that was the prayer I had in front of me. And I'm thinking, oh, I'll have more shops.

38:14Or I'll have like, land in Jamaica. Right. And I'll have a helicopter. And I'm thinking about worldly goods, right? Right. And he was like, no, I'm gonna make you a fisher of people, and you're gonna have a whole lot of— you're gonna be an automaton. I'm like, God, this is not what I asked you for. And I said, what you need, Tanika, not what you want.

38:36I needed a condo in Jamaica with that helicopter, with a helicopter. But like, like finding your new why, because your why does change. Yes. It changes for men and women at different ages and stages. As kids grow up, as the shop gets better, like you said, the sandwich generation, the kids are this age and your parents are this age, and then you think you're taking care of everybody, then everything is working out better, and then you forgot about yourself.

39:05You know, what did I do with myself now? Yeah. Yeah. Because your identity is wrapped up in everything else. Identity is wrapped up in Santana and Jordan and Brown's Automotive. Yes. Yeah. And it's hard to shift. It's hard to develop a new identity. Oh, I've seen landslide a lot. That's what happens. Yeah. Now, I have a lot of landslide moments, which is, I've been afraid of changing 'cause I built my life around Brown's Automotive.

39:32But— yeah. So— it's true. I love how my conversations just go absolutely nowhere. That's my favorite thing. So, what's new for you, Miss— she's Mavis now. Yes, we're building a house. That's been an adventure. We'll see how it was going while I've been gone. It's been quite the adventure. I've been following Dominic's journey. Yeah, we had a little bit of trouble, but you know, it'll always work out.

40:04The Lord doesn't give you more than you can handle, right? That's what he said, but I had questions about that too, sir. We'll all find out. That was not mine for me to handle. You gave that to the wrong person. That's right. That's right. Yeah. Or I hope that's the worst of it, because if there's more coming, oh, ladies. I'm not ready for it.

40:21That's right. And you? I'm working on my private pilot's license. Oh, you have no idea how bad I want to do that. Really? So I had a customer who had like an old '87 RX-7, and he always thought his daughter— he had a daughter late in age, and he's like, oh, she's going to want it. She's going to want it. She does not want that car.

40:39And he's a pilot. He's a commercial pilot. And he flew— I forget which It was brand new. I think it was Navy. And so he's like, well, help me sell it. And I sold it. And he's like, well, how much do I owe you? I said, flying lessons. And so I went up with him a couple of times and it was like, so cool.

40:54It is so cool. When I said on my Facebook post this weekend, like, I wish that pilot let me fly this plane. He wouldn't let me. I love it. So good for you. Thanks. Yeah, I'm— I have about 15 hours right now in my logbook and I'm working towards my goal. Maybe I'll solo this spring. Birdie's gonna be up there with the birds.

41:14That's right. She can fly you to Jamaica. Yes, there we go. I love the land. Maybe if you tell them you're gonna use it for our next women's retreat, you'll get it. Exactly. That's what I would say, sir. We need to get this for a women's retreat. Serve a good purpose. Yes, Mimi, what are you doing? Well, we have a fun project going on at home.

41:33We're putting on a screened-in porch. I love the outdoors. The outdoors. And it's a project. It's a small project, but it's a project, and I'm enjoying it. And I plan on spending more time with the grandkids. We have a family wedding coming up this year. So, a lot of good things. I'm so glad you ladies have put in so much work in the industry, and we appreciate it.

41:57Thank you. And we're just gonna have to find more people to follow behind you so we can keep this all going. That's right. Yeah, recruitment. Get them ladies in. And we have to recruit sponsors too. Sponsors too, to keep this going, keep women connected. So, tell everybody how to get in touch with you and when the weekly meetings are. So, the weekly meetings are Wednesdays, 1 o'clock Central, 2 o'clock Eastern time, almost every single Wednesday.

42:30You wanna become a member? Currently, membership is free. You go on our website, www.amazingwia.com. There's a little button that says, become a member. Fill that out. You'll start getting the weekly emails with the reminder, and it'll have the Zoom link for the meeting in it. If you wanna donate, you can go online and donate. We've also got fabulous t-shirts, and hats, and goodies.

42:56Sweatshirts. Sweatshirts. And in 2026, we just started a twice-monthly newsletter. So, there's no cost to that. But if you wanted to sponsor, we'd get your name on there. You could write an article. It's a great way to connect with the whole industry, men and women, that we're supporting women in the industry. But women tend to be decision makers in the shop. Yes.

43:15So it's a great audience to have your business in front of. Absolutely, man. And so, and if you need my email, it's tiffany@amazingwia.com. Reach out for anything. We're a 501 nonprofit, so it is tax deductible. So you have no excuse. No excuses. No excuses. Well, ladies, I had so much fun talking to you guys. I'm glad you joined. I didn't know you were here.

43:37Thank you for coming. It was a surprise to me too. Surprise! We were like, we were like, let's see if she'll join. She pulled me aside. Come with us. All right, so you got trade show floor again today. It's on our way down. So, let's go down there and get some bands and give them out. I'm gonna take out a handful of bands and I will give them out today.

43:55Thank you. All right, ladies, thank you so much. Thank you, Tanika. Thanks for having us. Branston! I love it. Cute.